


X-Texts with X-Nerds

by orphan_account



Category: X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Because X-Men Apocalypse took place in the 80's, F/F, F/M, M/M, Musicals mentioned, None of the X-Men are straight actually, Storm is Aromantic, Tag along the way, They're a bunch of musicals nerds, cHANGED THE NAME, chat fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2018-12-30 19:12:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12115350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: A possibly-meme filled chat.. No, not really. Peter speaks up in the chat first, but dies later on.





	1. Jubs the ticket master

**Author's Note:**

> Chat names  
> Laura - Snikt #2  
> Jubilee - Baby Your a Firework  
> Storm - Queen of Storms  
> Wanda - Shut up Pie  
> Peter - Sanic  
> Scott - One eyed mutant  
> Jean - "Hi daaad"  
> Kurt - The amazing Nightcrawler  
> Kitty - Pretty Kitty  
> Rouge - Why  
> Gambit - ROOUUGE

**Sanic** : SHNETJDSHJFF  
**Sanic** : GUYS  
**Sanic** : https://youtu.be/Zq9gy6MFrl4  
**Sanic** : IM DYINFDGHSDGN

 **Shut up Pie** : This  
**Shut up Pie** : This will finally be the day he'll die

 **Sanic** : I'll die  
**Sanic** : If it catches up to me

 **Queen of Storms** : Oh haha  
**Queen of Storms** : You're fast  
**Queen of Storms** : You make that joke every fucking day

 **Baby Your a Firework** : OOOOH  
**Baby Your a Firework** : PETER SHE CALLED YOUR A SS OUT

 **Snikt #2** : Honey, did you space your swear word out?

 **Baby Your a Firework** : Maybe I did. What's your damage?

 **Snikt #2** : I'm divorcing you

 **The amazing Nightcrawler** : You married Jubilee, Laura?

 **Snikt #2** : No  
**Snikt #2** : I was making a joke

 **Sanic** : Wait

 _Sanic_ changed _The amazing Nightcrawler_ 's name to _The Incrediblely Cute Nightcrawler_

 **Shut up Pie** : For f uck sake Peter

 _Shut up Pie_ changed _The Incrediblely Cute Nightcrawler_ 's name to _The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler_

 **Sanic** : I will fight you  
**Sanic** : That's MY BOYFRIEND WANDA  
**Sanic** : GO DATE YOUR TOASTER WANDA

 **Shut up Pie** : pfFFT  
**Shut up Pie** : YOU AND YOUR DEVIL SON BOYFRIEND 

_Shut up Pie_ left the chat

 **"Hi daaad"** : Why are you two fighting this week?

 **Sanic** : That quote that's your name  
**Sanic** : I told everyone remember?

 **One eyed mutant** : Wait  
**One eyed mutant** : What happened?  
**One eyed mutant** : I wasn't told

 **Sanic** : That's because I don't like you  
**Sanic** : But I'll tell you  
**Sanic** : A couple days ago when Dadneto passed by, Wanda didn't look up from her homework and had a voice crack and said "Hi daaad"

 **Pretty Kitty** : THAT WAS AMAZING 

**Why** : You all rude

 _Why_ added _Shut up Pie_ to the chat

 **Shut up Pie** : I was enjoying two minutes without my phone going off

 **ROOUUGE** : That was nice of you chere 

**Why** : Remy I hope you realize that you spelt my name wrong  
**Why** : it's too late to fix it now though 

**ROOUUGE** : Eyup

 **Why** : Wait

 _Why_ changed _ROOUUGE_ 's name to  
_Creole Bastard_

 **Creole Bastard** : Rouge I thought you loved me

 **"Hi daaad"** : CREOLE BASTARD IN HIS TAUNTS

 **Queen of Storms** : SAY WHAT 

**Pretty Kitty:** HAMILTON PUBLISHES HIS RESPONSE 

**Sanic** : SIT DOWN JOHN

 **Snikt #2** : YOU FAT MOTHER FUCKER

 **Creole Bastard:** Hamilton is out of control 

**Baby Your a Firework** : Haha  
**Baby Your a Firework** : You all suck  
**Baby Your a Firework** : I bought tWO tickets to see DEH

 **The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : What is DEH?

 **Snikt #2** : DEAR EVAN HANSEN

 **Sanic** :Babe  
**Sanic** : We talked about this

 **The Incrediblely Cute Nightcrawler** Oh yeah 

**"Hi daaad"** : Are we not going to mention that Kurt's English is getting better?

 **Snikt #2** : IM COMING MY JUBILEE

 **Pretty Kitty** : Guess not  
**Pretty Kitty** :BUT HOW DID SHE GET TICKETS TO DEH??

 **Baby Your a Firework** : LEAVE MY PRECIOUS GIRLFRIEND ALONE -Laura  
**Baby Your a Firework** : AT LEAST MINE DOESNT GIVE PEOPLE NIGHTMARES -Laura  
**Baby Your a Firework** : She dropped her phone while running  
**Baby Your a Firework** : She only loves me for my ticket mastery


	2. What are you? Freaking straight?

**Sanic** : LAST ONE TO REPLY IS STRAIGHT

 **Snikt #2** : Not risking it

 **Baby Your a Firework** : Not risking it

 **Shut up Pie** : Not risking it 

**Queen of Storms** : Not risking it

 **"Hi daaad"** : Not risking it

 **Why** : Not risking it

 **The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : Not risking it

 **Creole Bastard** : Not risking it  
**Creole Bastard** : Can someone change my name?

 ** _Pretty Kitty_** changed **_Creole Bastard_** 's name to **_Dammit Gambit_**

 **Dammit Gambit** : Why is there always a swear word in my name

 **Pretty Kitty** : Not risking it

 **One eyed mutant** : Not risking it

 **Sanic** : Dude

 **One eyed mutant** : What?

 **Sanic** : You did that on purpose  
**Sanic** : What are you, f*cking straight?

 **One eyed mutant** : Actually  
**One eyed mutant** : I am  
**One eyed mutant** : So suck it

 **Sanic** : GLADY  
**Sanic** : ESPECIALLY KURTS  
**Sanic** : CAUSE IM NOT STRAIGHT  
**Sanic** : B ITCH  
**Sanic** : IM F UCKING GAY 

**The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : Wait  
**The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : What does suck it mean?

 **Sanic** : Nothing babe

 **Shut up Pie** : We all get it Peter  
**Shut up Pie** : You're gay  
**Shut up Pie** : So is Kitty, Laura, Bobby, Erik and I'm positive that Dani is  
**Shut up Pie** : Probably more

 **Snikt #2** : ACA SCUSE ME  
**Snikt #2** : YOU CANT EXPOSE ME LIKE THIS WANDA

 **Pretty Kitty** : Dani is actually confused on her sexuality  
**Pretty Kitty** : DONT OUT ME LIKE THIS

 **Baby Your a Firework** : Heere's what we'll do  
**Baby Your a Firework** : Anyone who's gay say rainbow

 **Sanic** : Rainbow

 **Snikt #2** : Rainbow

 **Pretty Kitty** : Rainbow

 **Baby Your a Firework** : If you're bisexual say Bi and Ready To Die

 **Dammit Gambit** : Bi and Ready To Die

 **Why** : Bi and Ready To Die

 **Queen of Storms** : Wait  
**Queen of Storms** : Really?

 **Sanic** : Rogue you never told us your sexuality  
**Sanic** : How long have you known?

 **Why** : Since I was...11 maybe?

 **Pretty Kitty** : ELEVEN

 **Shut up Pie** : B itch  
**Shut up Pie** : We've known you since you were young

 **Sanic** : WE GREW UP TOGETHER

 **The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : Them why dint you guys remember me

 **Shut up Pie** : We were babies  
**Shut up Pie** : And your mom was with Azazel

 **The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : Ah

 **Baby Your a Firework** : Anyone else who's bisexual?  
**Baby Your a Firework** : Okay no  
**Baby Your a Firework** : If you're pansexual say Pancakes

 **The Incredibly Cute Nightcrawler** : Pancakes

 **Baby Your a Firework** : Pancakes

 **"Hi daaad"** : Why pancakes?  
**"Hi daaad"** : Pancakes by the way

 **Baby Your a Firework** : If I didn't mentions yours (I sincerely apologize) just say other and what your sexuality is

 **Queen of Storms** : Other  
**Queen of Storms** : Aromatic asexual  
**Queen of Storms** : I've never had an interest in guys, girls or any others

 **Shut up Pie** : other  
**Shut up Pie** : Not exactly a sexuality, but I'm not sure  
**Shut up Pie** : Even if I'm not sure, I still love Vision

 **Sanic** : Toaster x Violet

 **Shut up Pie** : SHUT UP PIETRO 

**Baby Your a Firework** : Scott you didn't say anything

 **One eyed mutant** : Cause I'm as straight as a ruler 

**Snikt #2** : Hey Scott?

 **One eyed mutant** : Yeah Laura?

 **Snikt #2** : Before my dad died and you guys met me, what did you think of Logans abs?

 **One eyed mutant** : HDKXKSBS  
**One eyed mutant** : HE WAS SO HANDSOME AND SH IT  
**One eyed mutant** : JEAN AND I WOULD JUST STARE AT HIM LIKE THE F UCKING BI AND PAN SEXUALS WE ARE  
**One eyed mutant** : S hit

 **Sanic** : DUDE

 **One eyed mutant** : HOW DO I DELETE THIS TEXT AND MY LIFE

 **Baby Your a Firework** : And you go in the Bi and Ready To Die section

 **One eyed mutant** : HOW THE HELL DID LOGANS ABS TRIGGER THIS

**Author's Note:**

> Kitty is dating Danielle Moonstar/Mirage in this AU. Also, DEH was mentioned once in (I think) X-Men Gold and I freaked out over it. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!  
> I would really appreciate a comment as well :)


End file.
